Not from the Onion.

From the Guardian:

Former Spice Girl Geri Halliwell claims to have hung up her hotpants and Union Jack boots for the last time, today embarking on a new career as a children's author.

Wait.  Didn't this already happen?  Well, whatever.  We'll see how it goes.

No, wait -- now I feel totally comfortable in making up my mind before I read the book:

"...each instalment of the book will end with a newsletter in which Ugenia sums up what she has learnt from her experience, concluding with shrewd and concise moral aphorims such as "face your fear"."

Yecch.

[Later:  Also not from The Onion.  (via Finding Wonderland)]